Month: July 2023

When Figuring Out What You Want To Do In Life, You Include The Evil


Written by Alden Tan

There’s so much information and “inspiration” out there today when it comes to figuring out what you want to do in life.

A variation of that would be learning how to achieve your goals, chase your dreams or do what you love while making a living out of it.

Personally, from experience, if you want to have a good answer for yourself, you need to be extremely honest.

You need to include the evil:

  • If you want to become fucking rich as fuck, then say you want to become fucking rich as fuck. Say you want the lambos, private jets and private yachts. Say you want to at least experience them once in your life despite many rich people saying that they’re meaningless pursuits.
  • You can’t just say you’re not in it for the money. That’s impossible. You still need to make a little to survive. Money is definitely not evil.
  • If you’re telling others you’re in it to help others only because others say you should, you’re not really going to help others since it’s not from the heart.
  • Perhaps you can say, you are okay to help a few people at a time only. Then when you need to rest, you rest. You then refuse to help others.
  • Despite a TikTok video being extremely viral, it doesn’t mean you need do or follow what it preaches. If it’s not something aligned with you, then don’t follow.
  • No, you’re not wrong if you don’t want to follow along, despite their seemingly good intentions.
  • Even if you’re in some “wholesome” industry like self-improvement or mental health, you still get to watch out for yourself. You get to turn people down, say no and reap your own benefits first.
  • Above all else, in a business, you need to crunch numbers to see how you can grow. This means placing numbers above feelings. You also need to network and meet people just for your own benefits. This means casting people who despite being good people, are essentially useless.
  • And sometimes, if you don’t want to fucking hustle 24/7, that’s fine. Just say you don’t want to. Take a damn break. Drink beer, eat shit, screw around and have fun every once in a while.

The post When Figuring Out What You Want To Do In Life, You Include The Evil appeared first on

She Said To Me, “I Am So Happy To See You Happy”


Written by Alden Tan

Years ago, I was in Bali with a friend. She worked as a tour guide there. We spent every day together.

One night, while drinking away with her and a bunch of her friends and strangers we met along the way, she told me abruptly:

“I am so happy to see you happy.”

And that stuck with me since.

I honestly never had anyone tell me that before, that they were actually just happy to see me happy.

Maybe others have felt the same, but to have it verbalized to me really meant something to me. It’s like for once, somebody actually doesn’t have a bunch of ridiculous expectations or dubious intent on me.

How many people in your life are happy because you are happy? Do you know of anyone whose reason for being happy is you being happy?

Do you have someone in your life, whom when you see happy, makes everything worth it?

The post She Said To Me, “I Am So Happy To See You Happy” appeared first on

I Am In The Trenches With You, But How Will You Get Me Out Of It?


Written by Alden Tan

I was having a chat with a friend of mine about mental health.

He has heard my views and listened to my stories. He’s seen my writing. He knows where I come from.

And he asked me this, “I see that you’re with me, with us in the trenches, but how will you get us out of it?”

Truly, I don’t know. I don’t know how to get you out. I don’t have all the answers and neither do I really have what it takes to ease all of your pain.

That to me, is one of the key points in helping people when it comes to mental health: To be there for people on the same ground.

That’s how you truly empathize with someone and let them know that they’re not alone.

God forbid that I slap “Mindfulness” or some other trite solution in your face. They may work for you. Hell, there’s a high chance that it would. But if the delivery means robotically giving them to you without any form of humanity, then I think it’s useless altogether.

Because we are social creatures. We need one another in our own individual, subjectively special way. As we all evolve collectively through time, I personally believe stories will never die, be it just in our social lives or in the realm of marketing and business.

I am in the trenches with you.

And I’ll gladly listen and hug it out even though we’re dirty and have shit all over.

The post I Am In The Trenches With You, But How Will You Get Me Out Of It? appeared first on